I had the privilege of speaking to a beautiful group of women last night. We enjoyed a delicious BBQ supper, had some fun together weighing purses (way to go Candice with the 6 lb handbag!), and spent a few minutes reflecting on the story of The Ugly Duckling.
If anyone is visiting today from the Friends & Company event at WECA I would LOVE for you to post a comment and say “Hi!”
Here’s a mini-recap of the message God placed on my heart (with the promised resource list at the end) …
1. Who or what defines you?
We have a tendency to allow ourselves to find our definition by the labels we wear. Whether they are basic labels that identify more what we do than who we are – mother, single, career woman, etc., or labels based on our life circumstances and choices – bankrupt, divorced, overweight, mother of the year, and more, we are mistaken if we allow those labels to tell us who we are or who we were created to be.
2. What is the enemy?
Comparison is our enemy. Comparison crushes our creativity. Comparison crushes our confidence. Comparison crushes our contentment. When we compare our lives to that of others, it’s essential that we remember what we general see is only their “highlight reel.” It’s unfair to us and them to compare their highlight reel to our bloopers and outtakes.
3. Who were you created to be?
You were not created to be a mother, a pastor, an accountant, a writer. You were not created to be in constant competition, striving to measure up. You were created for ONE purpose – so that you could be loved. Which is why He calls you His Beloved.
You are loved just for who and what you are. You are loved without needing to change one thing about your personality, your emotions, your actions, or your choices. You are precious in His sight.
4. How can you move from being labelled to being Beloved?
a.) It’s impossible to understand how loved you are until you know the heart of your Creator.
Get to know His heart by reading His Word, worshipping Him with music, art, dance, writing, being in nature, etc., and learning from the wisdom of others who know Him intimately (by attending church, participating in Bible studies and book studies, getting to know other women who love God).
b.) It’s impossible to love who you are if you don’t know who you are.
Get to know yourself. Start by making a list (you don’t have to do this, but personally I am a big fan of lists) of what you like, what you enjoy, what you’re passionate about, the personality traits and physical characteristics that make you unique, what brings you joy, what causes your heart to break, the causes that you support…
You may find this downloadable Resource List for Self-Discovery helpful in getting to know who you are.
But as you step out into a journey of self-exploration, always keep this in mind: These are simply tools. Indicators that you can use to gain understanding and insight. They are not dictators, telling you who you are or should be. Nor are they all-knowing. Sometimes a tool will give you a result that’s just plain wrong. Or just plain doesn’t matter. Take what is useful and toss the rest. If you’re not sure, ask someone close to you what they agree or disagree with. Better yet, ask God.
Most importantly, allow yourself to be loved. You are worthy. You are precious. You are chosen. You are beautiful. You are a swan!
* Credits to my sweet friend, Kristi, for snapping photos and running the book table all evening. You bless me!
